Arlington, Massachusetts reputed to suck

Everyone should check out The Virtual Suck Tour of Arlington, Mass.

I feel for this kid. I myself come from a town that was so incredibly boring and crappy that the only thing they had to brag about was the fact that the town was the "population center of the United States." They were actually really excited about this.

Being "the population center of the United States" means that, if you took a board and cut it to the exact shape of a map of the the United States, and then put weights on it (I'm not making this up) at the points corresponding to where every person lives, the population center would be the point where you could stick a pin underneath the board and it would balance, assuming the board itself was weightless.

Why anyone ever bothered to figure this out is completely beyond me. And anyway, when I was a freshman in high school, they had a new census and the "population center" moved about 60 miles west. If there's anything lamer than being "the population center of the United States," it's being "the former population center of the United States."

Oh yeah, and we didn't even have a Dunkin' Donuts. Needless to say, I got the fuck out of there the first chance I had, which was to go to college as far away from that town as I could possibly get. I passed through there once about 5 years later and the valedictorian of my high school class was working at the Quik-Trip Convenience Mart. That's what happens when you don't get out, I guess.